It must have been a bantam who thought of this ingenious ruse.

* * * * *

THE NORTH ATLANTIC TRADE.

As I was walking beside the docks I met a pal o' mine
I sailed with once on the Colonies run in Thomson's Blue Star Line;
Said I, "What cheer--what brings you here?" "Why, 'aven't you 'eard?"
he said;
"I'm under the Windsor 'ouse-flag now in the North Atlantic trade.
We sweep a bit an' we fight a bit--an' that's what we like the best--
But a towin' job or a salvage job, they all go in with the rest;
When we aren't too busy upsettin' old Fritz an' 'is frightfulness
blockade,
A bit of all sorts don't come amiss in the North Atlantic trade."

"And how does old Atlantic look?" "Oh, round an' about the same;
'E 'asn't seemed to alter a lot since I've been in the game;
'E's about as big as 'e always was, an' 'e's pretty well just as wet
(Or, if there's some parts anyway dry, well, I 'aven't struck none
yet!),
There's the same old bust-up, same old mess, when a green sea breaks
inboard,
An' the equinoctials roarin' by the same as they've always roared,
An' the West Wind playin' the same old larks 'e's been at since the
world was made--
They've a peach of a time, 'ave sailormen, in the North Atlantic
trade."