The inspector frowned and was going to make a note of this, so I tried
to distract his attention.

"Do you know," I said, "a short time ago people persisted in mistaking
me for a brother of the Duke of Cotsall?"

"Why?" he asked--rather rudely.

"Because of the strawberry mark on my upper lip. Ah, I think this
is the orchard. There was a wealth of bloom here when I put in my
application."

"Applications were not made till the fruit was on the trees," said
Lord RHONDDA'S minion, sharply. "Ah, there's a nice lot of plums."

This seemed more satisfactory.

"Yes, isn't there?" I said enthusiastically. "Now I'm sure _this_
makes up the amount all right."

"Plums are stone fruit," he observed stonily, "and you were allocated
one hundredweight of sugar for your _soft_ fruit, I believe?"

One really gets very tired of people who go on harping on the same
thing over and over again.

"What about raspberries?" I inquired.

"Soft fruit, of course," said the inspector.