The Best American Humorous Short Stories by Unknown
page 199 of 393 (50%)
page 199 of 393 (50%)
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officer now, an' in course I natchel _has_ to be away sometimes an' on
expenses at 'tother places, an' it seem like some 'lowance ought by good rights to be made for that; don't you think so?" "Why, matter o' course, Matt; what you think? I ain't so powerful good at figgers. Nervy is. S'posen you speak to her 'bout it." "Oh, that's perfec' unuseless, Pink. I'm a' officer o' the law, Pink, an' the law consider women--well, I may say the law, _she_ deal 'ith _men_, not women, an' she expect her officers to understan' figgers, an' if I hadn't o' understood figgers Mr. Sanks wouldn't or darsnt' to 'p'int me his dep'ty. Me 'n' you can fix them terms. Now see here, reg'lar bo'd--eatin' bo'd, I mean--is ten dollars, an' sleepin' and singuil meals is 'cordin' to the figgers you've sot for 'em. Ain't that so? Jes' so. Now, Pink, you an' me'll keep a runnin' account, you a-chargin' for reg'lar bo'd, an' I a'lowin' to myself credics for my absentees, accordin' to transion customers an' singuil mealers an' sleepers. Is that fa'r, er is it not fa'r?" Mr. Fluker turned his head, and after making or thinking he had made a calculation, answered: "That's--that seem fa'r, Matt." "Cert'nly 'tis, Pink; I knowed you'd say so, an' you know I'd never wish to be nothin' but fa'r 'ith people I like, like I do you an' your wife. Let that be the understandin', then, betwix' us. An' Pink, let the understandin' be jes' betwix' _us_, for I've saw enough o' this world to find out that a man never makes nothin' by makin' a blowin' horn o' his business. You make the t'others pay up spuntial, monthly. |
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