A week later I went and weighed him again; he had shrunk to forty.

I am a man of action. In a flash my mind was made up. I put him on a
string and led him home.

My wife seemed rather surprised when we entered the drawing-room, but
I hastened to explain.

"I paid five pounds," I said, "for a five-pound pig. Since then I 've
paid fifty-five pounds more, and I have been led to expect, that at
the very least the pig was keeping pace. But it isn't. The sterling
is increasing by leaps and bounds; the avoirdupois is not even
stationary. That's not counting several tons of swill that ought to
be inside him but aren't. It can't go on." I paused and added darkly,
"That pig shall not return."

"But surely you're not going to have him live with _us_, Henry?"

I controlled myself.

"No, Maria," I said, "I am not. At a late hour to-night we will take
him out into the country and lose him."

"Oh, Henry," she began, "supposing--"

I interrupted gently but firmly.

"My mind," said I, "like BERT COOTE'S, is made up. He is my pig and I
may do what I like with him. There is no law against one losing one's