flesh and blood, her name was Lucy Mainspring, the daughter of a
horologer, sir,--a watchmaker--_vulgo_ so called--and though
fattish, she was very fair--fair! by Jupiter, (craving your honour's
pardon for swearing,) she fairly made me give all other thoughts the
cut, and twisted the passions of my heart with the red-hot torturing
irons of love. 'Pon honour, sir, I almost grow foolish when I think of
those days; but love, sir, nothing can resist love."

"I hope, Mr. Tims, you were in better luck with Miss Mainspring?"

"A _leetle_ a _leetle_ patience, your honour, and all will be
out as quick as directly--in the twinkling of a bed-post.--For three
successive nights I sat up in a brown study, with a four-in-the-pound
candle burning before me till almost cock-crow, composing a love-letter,
a most elaborate affair, the pure overflowing of _la belle passion_,
all about Venus, Cupids, bows and arrows, hearts, darts, and them things,
which, having copied neatly over on a handsome sheet of foolscap, turned
up with gilt, (for, though I say it myself, I scribble a smart fist,) I
made a blotch of red wax on the back as large as a dollar, that thereon
I might the more indelibly impress a seal, with a couple of pigeons
cooing upon it, and '_toujours wotre_' for the motto. This I popped
into the post-office, and waited patiently--may I add confidently?--for
the result.

"No answer having come as I expected _per_ return, I began to smell
that I was in the wrong box; so, on the following evening, I had a
polite visit from her respectable old father, Daniel Mainspring, who
asked me what my intentions were?--'To commence wig-maker on my own
bottom,' answered I.--'But with respect to my daughter, sir?'--'Why, to
be sure, to make her mistress, sir.'--'Mistress!' quoth he, 'did I hear