tight, handsome little figure, with the Spanish cap and cloak, attended
by a trusty servant in the same costume, to whom I am pointing where he
is to bring the cherry-brandy; when, lo! we perceive the hideous
apparition!--and straightway rushing forward, like two tigers on a
jackass, we seize the wigless dotard, and, calling for a blanket, the
whole respectable company of forty couples and upwards, come crowding to
the spot, and lend a willing hand in rotation, four by four, in tossing
Malachi, the last of the lovers, till the breath of life is scarcely
left in his vile body.

"'Now Lucy,' says I, in conclusion, 'don't you see the confounded
absurdity of ever wasting a thought on a broken-down, bandy-legged,
beggarly dragoon? Just look at him, with an old taffeta whigmaleerie
tied to his back, like Paddy from Cork, with his coat buttoned behind!
Isn't he a pretty figure, now, to go a-courting? You would never forsake
the like of me--would you now? A spruce, natty little body of a
creature--to be the trollop of a spindle-shanked veteran, who, besides
having one foot in the grave, and a nose fit for three, might be your
great-grandfather?'

"It was a sight, sir, that would have melted the heart of a
wheel-barrow. Before the whole assembled exhibition-room, Lucy first
looked blue, and then blushed consent. 'Toby,' said she, 'don't mention
it, Toby, dear,--I am thine for ever and a day!' Angelic sounds, which
at once sent Bottlenose to Coventry. His chance was now weak indeed,
quite like Grantham gruel, three groats to a gallon of water. In an
ecstacy of passion, sir, I threw my silk handkerchief on the floor, and,
kneeling on it with one knee, I raised her gloveless fingers to my lips!

"The whole company clapped their hands, and laughed so heartily in