will take what remains," she said cheerfully.


"Help! Help!" cried an Italian laborer near the mud flats of the Harlem
river.

"What's the matter there?" came a voice from the construction shanty.

"Queek! Bringa da shov'! Bringa da peek! Giovanni's stuck in da mud."

"How far in?"

"Up to hees knees."

"Oh, let him walk out."

"No, no! He no canna walk! He wronga end up!"


There once was a lady from Guam,
Who said, "Now the sea is so calm
I will swim, for a lark";
But she met with a shark.
Let us now sing the ninetieth psalm.


BRICKLAYER (to mate, who had just had a hodful of bricks fall on his
feet)--"Dropt 'em on yer toe! That's nothin'. Why, I seen a bloke get
killed stone dead, an' 'e never made such a bloomin' fuss as you're
doin'."