NEW VERSION.--Every dog must have his--_year_ (of muzzling).

* * * * *

THE GAME OF PEACE.

[Illustration]

_April_.--Grand informal meeting of the Crowned Heads of Europe (with
the CZAR in the chair) to discuss a scheme of general disarmament,
at which the Emperor of GERMANY creates a profound sensation by the
announcement that, as a hint to his brother Monarchs, he has himself
gone on to the retired list, burnt his cocked-hat, disbanded the
Pomeranian Grenadiers, and confined Herr KRUPP for ten years in a
second-class fortress.

_May_.--By arrangement, all the great powers call in the uniforms of
all their troops and present them to the King of the BELGIANS, on the
understanding that, as the Emperor of the Congo, he shall forthwith
transport them to Africa, and instantly commence the clothing of seven
millions of the naked native population.

_June_.--One hundred and eighty thousand horses, with military
training, coming suddenly on to the market, four-in-hand Hansoms at a
penny an hour, become common in all the great European capitals, and
the Derby, for which there are 1371 entries, is won by a Cossack pony,
trained in Siberia.

_July_.--The barrels of all the magazine rifles melted down, and
recast, utilised for the production of type-writers, which, being