where the Isle of Wight is regarded as the acme of stupidity. When the
Isle of Wight people first began to walk erect, instead of on all
fours, they are said to have waggled their arms and hands helplessly
before them, saying, "And what be we to do with these-um?"

Classical names are very uncommon among villagers, but in my old
Surrey parish there was one which was the cause of much speculation.
The name was Hercules; it originated in a disagreement between the
parents, before the child was christened. The mother wanted his name
to be John, but the father insisted, that as an older son was Noah,
the only possible name for the new baby was "Hark" (Ark). They had a
lengthy argument, and there was no definite understanding before
reaching the church. The mother, when asked to "name this child,"
being flustered, hesitated, but finally stammered out, "Hark, please."
The vicar was puzzled, and repeated the question with the same result;
a third attempt was equally unsuccessful, and the vicar, in despair,
falling back upon his classical knowledge, christened the child
Hercules. A few days later the vicar called at the cottage, and the
mother explained the matter, relating how indignant she was with her
husband, and how on the way home, "Hark, I says to him, ain't the name
of a Christian, it's the name of a barge!"




CHAPTER XXVI.



IS ALDINGTON (FORMER SITE) THE ROMAN ANTONA?