place, amid good-natured cries of 'Gas!'

'I feel sure you will all agree with me,' he began, 'that this evening
would not be complete without a vote of thanks--a very hearty vote of
thanks--to our excellent host and chairman.'

Ear-splitting applause.

'I've got a little story to tell you,' he continued--'a story that up
to this moment has been a close secret between his Worship the Mayor and
myself.' His Worship looked up sharply at the speaker. 'You've heard
about some geese, I reckon. (_Laughter_.) Well, you've not heard all,
but I'm going to tell you. I can't keep it to myself any longer. You
think his Worship drove those geese--I hope they're digesting well
(_loud laughter_)--just for fun. He didn't. I was with him when he
bought them, and I happened to say that goosedriving was a very
difficult accomplishment.'

'Depends on the geese!' shouted a voice.

'Yes, it does,' Mr. Gordon admitted. 'Well, his Worship contradicted me,
and we had a bit of an argument. I don't bet, as you know--at least, not
often--but I don't mind confessing that I offered to bet him a sovereign
he couldn't drive his geese half a mile. "Look here, Gordon," he said to
me: "there's a lot of distress in the town just now--trade bad, and so
on, and so on. I'll lay you a level ten pounds I drive these geese to
Hillport myself, the loser to give the money to charity." "Done," I
said. "Don't say anything about it," he says. "I won't," I says--but I
am doing. (_Applause_.) I feel it my duty to say something about it.
(_More applause_.) Well, I lost, as you all know. He drove 'em to