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[Illustration: GENTLE SATIRE.

"I SAY, BILL, LOOK 'ERE! 'ERE'S A OLD COVE OUT RECORD-BREAKING!"]

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"THE DILEMMA."

(_An old Irish Story newly applied._)

["On which horn of the dilemma will the Gladstonians elect
to stand?"--_Mr. Chamberlain, in his controversy with Sir
W. Harcourt on the place of Home Rule in the Gladstonian
programme._]

_Faithful Unionist Sentry, loquitur_:--

Faith! yes, a dilemma, no doubt, is _the_ thing
To stagger Big Bounce, in a fashion Socratic.
I fancy I know now to plant a sharp sting,
The success of my bayonet-play is emphatic.
Remember a picture I once chanced to see,
A Pompeian sentinel posed at a portal,
And "faithful to death" though fire threatened. That's Me!
As my country's defender, my fame is immortal.

Yes, the Sentinel's _rôle_ suits my style passing well;