sung by a wandering Sam Oar Troupe on their visiting Egypt and the
Provinces before the time of the Celtic-Phoenician O'SIRIS, or at
least before the reign of RAMESES THE FIRST, ancestor of the great
Scotch RAMSEY family--(_Cheers_)--at one of the social entertainments
given on a non-hunting day by that eminent sportsman NIMROD. Then
came the question of where was "the corner" in which Jakorna secluded
himself? Of course, Christmas, as differentiating this pie from all
others, was a modern substitution. The original word was probably
"Kosmik." (_The lecture was still proceeding when our Reporter left,
the dryness of the subject having unfortunately affected his throat._)

* * * * *

[Illustration: A CONNOISSEUR.

_Sir Pompey Bedell._ "THIS BOTTLE OF ROMANÉE-CONTI SEEMS RATHER
CLOUDY, BROWN! IT _OUGHT_ TO BE ALL RIGHT. I KNOW IT STANDS ME IN
_TWELVE GUINEAS A DOZEN!_"

_The New Butler._ "THERE CERTAINLY _HIS_ SOME SEDIMENT, SIR POMPEY;
BUT IT'S OF NO CONSEQUENCE WHATEVER! I TRIED A BOTTLE OF IT _MYSELF_
THE OTHER DAY, AND FOUND IT FIRST-RATE!"]

* * * * *

"WHAT WILL HE DO WITH IT?"

["The 'tehorni narod'--the inconceivably ill-used, patient,
long-suffering 'black people,' as the moujiks of White
Russia are grimly denominated by their rulers--are dying by