holidays--1688 hours including nights! Isn't that jolly!

And now, my dear Mother, I want to write most seriously to you upon a
matter of great importance. You know I have been doing "Music" as an
"extra." Well, it does not agree with me. The fact is, it is an hour
every week in my playtime, when the Doctor says it is good for my
health that I should be enjoying myself. And "Music" is an extra,
like "Sausages for breakfast." And, of course, one has to think of
all that. How hard dear Papa works to get his living; and, of course,
I oughtn't to waste anything, ought I? Well, I really think I could
give up "Music." After all, it's awful rot, and only fit for a pack of
girls! So this is the great favour I'm going to ask you--and mind you
say "Yes." May I give up "Music," and take up "Sausages for breakfast"
instead?

Always your most loving Son, BOBBY.

* * * * *

IF THE FASHION SPREADS.

SCENE--_Interior of a Fashionable Church. The Incumbent has
read the Banns of Marriage between JOHN PLANTAGENET DE SMITH
and MARY STUART DE BROWN, and asks the usual question._

_Counsel_ (_rising in pew_). I beg to object.

_Incumbent_ (_surprised, but self-possessed_). You will be good enough
to communicate with us in the Vestry, at the end of the service,