_Chair._ And where are you quartered?

_Wit._ At the Royal Princess's Theatre, Oxford Street, where I have
these strange experiences of discipline, and where I am enlisted in
the unconventional, not to say illegal, way I have described, nightly;
nay, sometimes twice daily!

_Chair._ And why have you proffered your evidence?

_Wit._ Because I think the Public ought to know, my Lord, the great
services afforded by the most recent Melodrama to the popularity of
the Army, and--yes, the cause of recruiting!

[_The Witness then withdrew._

* * * * *

HOW THEY BRING THE GOOD NEWS!

All the papers teeming
With, the news of DEEMING
On the shore or ship;
Telling of his tearing
Hair that he was wearing
From his upper lip.

(T-SS-D, rush! Pursue it!
Buy it, bring it, glue it
On your model! Quick!)
Telling how he's looking,