PUNCH.--Be more respectful, sir, and reply to my questions. It appears
further, that several respectable persons have lost their honesty in your
booth.

RUSS.--Very little of that 'ere commodity is ever brought into it, my lud.

PUNCH.--And, in short, that you and your colleagues' hands have been
frequently found in the pockets of your audience.

RUSS.--Only in a professional way, my lud--strictly professional.

PUNCH.--But the most serious charge of all is that, on a recent occasion,
when the audience hissed your performances, you put out the lights, let in
the swell-mob, and raised a cry of "No Corn Laws."

RUSS.--Why, my lud, on that p'int I admit there was a slight row.

PUNCH.--Enough, sir. The court considers you have grossly misconducted
yourself, and refuses to grant you license to perform.

MEL.--But, my lord, I protest _I did_ nothing.

PUNCH.--So everybody says, sir. You are therefore unfit to have the
management of (next to my own) the greatest theatre in the world. You may
retire.

MEL. (_to_ RUSS.)--Oh! Johnny, this is your work--with your confounded
hanky-panky.

RUSS.--No--'twas you that did it; we have been ruined by your laziness.