like that, and to me."

The child became apologetic. "I'm sure I didn't mean to be, ma'am,"
she explained. "But mother told me before I came that I was to be
sure to speak to you like a lady, and when any ladies call on us, they
always ask us those questions."


A gentleman who had married his cook was giving a dinner party and
between the courses the good lady sat with her hands spread on the
tablecloth.

Suddenly the burr of conversation ceased and in the silence that
followed a young man on the right of his hostess said, pleasantly:

"Awful pause!"

"Yes, they may be," said the old-time cook, with heightened color;
"and yours would be like them if you had done half my work."


His relatives telephoned to the nearest florist's. The ribbon must be
extra wide, with "Rest in Peace" on both sides, and if there was room,
"We Shall Meet in Heaven."

The florist was away and his new assistant handled the job. There was
a sensation when the flowers turned up at the funeral. The ribbon was
extra wide, indeed, and on it was the inscription:

"Rest in peace on both sides, and, if there is room, we shall meet in