* * * * *

CHANGE FOR A TENOR.--Mr. SEYMOUR HADEN, the opponent of the Cremation
gospel according to THOMPSON (Sir HENRY of that ilk), should come to
an arrangement with the English Light Opera tenor, and tack COFFIN on
to his name.

* * * * *

ONLY FANCY!

(_FROM MR. PUNCH'S OWN RUMOURISTS._)

It may be interesting at this time of the year to mention the fact
that Lord SALISBURY always uses a poker in cracking walnuts. He says
it saves the silver. The other day, whilst wielding the poker across
the walnuts and the wine, Mr. GLADSTONE chanced to look in. The
Premier, with his well-known hospitality, immediately furnished
the Right Hon. Gentleman with another poker (brought in from the
drawing-room), and ordered up a fresh supply of nuts.

* * * * *

[Illustration]

Mr. GLADSTONE, recurring in private conversation to a recent visit
paid by him to Lord SALISBURY in Arlington Street, questioned the
convenience of a poker as an instrument for shattering the shell of
the walnut. For himself, he says, he has always found a pair of tongs
more convenient.