The Militants - Stories of Some Parsons, Soldiers, and Other Fighters in the World by Mary Raymond Shipman Andrews
page 44 of 232 (18%)
page 44 of 232 (18%)
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"The skies might have opened and the Lord's finger pointed at me, and I
couldn't have felt more shocked. The sermon was mostly tommy-rot, you know--platitudes. You could see that the man wasn't clever--had no grasp--old-fashioned ideas--didn't seem to have read at all. There was really nothing in it, and after a few sentences I didn't listen particularly. But there were two things about it I shall never forget, never, if I live to a hundred. First, all through, at every tone of his voice, there was the thought that the brokenhearted look in the eyes of this man, such a contrast to you in every way possible, might be the very look in your eyes after a while, if I left you. I think I'm not vain to know I make a lot of difference to you, father--considering we two are all alone." There was a questioning inflection, but he smiled, as if he knew. "You make all the difference. You are the foundation of my life. All the rest counts for nothing beside you." The father's voice was slow and very quiet. "That thought haunted me," went on the young man, a bit unsteadily, "and the contrast of the old clergyman and you made it seem as if you were there beside me. It sounds unreasonable, but it was so. I looked at him, old, poor, unsuccessful, narrow-minded, with hardly even the dignity of age, and I couldn't help seeing a vision of you, every year of your life a glory to you, with your splendid mind, and splendid body, and all the power and honor and luxury that seem a natural background to you. Proud as I am of you, it seemed cruel, and then it came to my mind like a stab that perhaps without me, your only son, all of that would--well, what you said just now. Would count for nothing--that you would be practically, some day, just a lonely and pathetic old man like that other." |
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