"Before the podgy dealer knew what had happened, she had sprung right
round him, seized the telephone instrument and placed her mouth to the
receiver. She smiled at him defiantly. 'Yes, I will,' she panted."--
_Daily Paper._

And then, we suppose, she wrote to the POSTMASTER-GENERAL to complain of
the inefficiency of the service.

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Junior Partner of Firm_ (_exempted on business grounds
during the War, interviewing applicant for employment, a demobilised
officer, D.S.O., M.C., mentioned twice in despatches and wounded three
times_). "YOU SAY YOU WERE THREE-AND-A-HALF YEARS IN FRANCE AND YET DON'T
SPEAK THE LANGUAGE? IT SEEMS TO ME YOU WASTED YOUR TIME ABROAD, SIR."]

* * * * *

CHANGES IN CLUB-LAND.

(_By a Student of Manners._)

The Roman satirist sang of poets reciting their verses in the month of
August. If he were alive now he would find as fruitful a subject in the
renovations and decorations of Clubland. Clubs are strange institutions;
they go in for Autumn not Spring cleaning. Happily all Clubs are not
renovated at the same time, otherwise the destitution of members would be
pitiful to contemplate. Even as it is the temporary accommodation offered
by their neighbours is not unattended by serious drawbacks. The standard of
efficiency in bridge and billiards is not the same; the cuisine of one