his personal property, and would let no one rob you but himself. I
would like, even now, to have within reach of my boot the old scoundrel
who took me inside the Great Pyramid. After following him in and by
the light of a candle climbing very carefully in stockinged feet the
granite passage (polished by millions of toes until it was as slippery
as glass), the old ruffian led me into the Queen's chamber, and then
announced that he had lost his candle but would show me the height of
the chamber by burning magnesian wire for the price of one piastre
(five cents) per second. After I had a good flash-light view of the
inside of this room, and marvelled sufficiently at the enormous size of
the blocks of marble in the walls and out of which the sarcophagus was
made, the old son of a thief told me it would be at the same rate that
he would light my way to the outside air again. I only had stockinged
feet, and made the foolish mistake of striking out in the dark. The
old boy howled, but I verily believe that I very nearly displaced one
of the eighty-ton blocks of marble. We arrived at the opening at the
same moment and I got a "full-Nelson" on the greasy blackguard. He
handed over the magnesian wire, also the candle, and was quite willing
to give me as many of his wives as I required before I released him. I
have never been in any place as hot as the inside of the Great Pyramid,
and no longer wonder that a mummy is so dried up. For in five minutes
pretty nearly every drop of moisture in my own body came out through
the pores of my skin.

I also was barmy enough to climb to the top of the Great Pyramid; each
separate block of stone to be surmounted was like the wall of a house,
but the view from the top was worth while, and might have been enjoyed
but for the thought of getting down again; especially as old Job (my
new guide) persisted in telling me about several people who had been
killed, bouncing all the way to the bottom. I did pretty well all the