told me he had often talked with my brother John about living a life
higher, nobler, and more self-denying than he had done. It appears
from his conversation that since I left home they have been impressed
with a deeper and better spirit. To me it is of much interest to
decide what I shall do. I have determined to make a visit to
Fruitlands. To leave this place is to me a great sacrifice. I have
been much refined in being here.

"To stay here--to purchase a place for myself--or to go home. These
are questions about which I feel the want of some friend to consult
with. I have no one to whom I can go for advice. If I wish to be
self-denying, one would say at home is the best, the largest field
for my activity. This may be true in one sense. But is it wise to go
where there are the most difficulties to overcome? Would it not be
better to plant the tree in the soil where it can grow most in every
direction? At home, to be sure, if I have strength to succeed, I may,
perhaps, do the most good, and it may be the widest sphere for me.
But there are many difficulties which have such a direct influence on
one to injure, to blight all high and noble sentiments, that I fear
to encounter them, and I am not sure it is my place. Perhaps it would
be best for me not to speculate on the future, but look to Him who is
above for wise direction in all that concerns my life. Sacrifices
must be made. I must expect and accept them in a meek, humble, and
willing spirit."

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