BRIGGS--No; I don't know one.

HOSTESS--Couldn't you make up one?

BRIGGS (_icily_)--Certainly not.

(_Gloom descends over the company, until the Poor Relative arrives,
staggering under the clothes-horse._)

CHORUS OF MEN GUESTS--Let me help you!

(_Improvised screen is finally arranged._ Briggs _performs "parlor
magic" for an hour. Guests, fidget, yawn and commence to drop away, one
by one._)

GUEST (_to Hostess_)--Really, we must tear ourselves away. Such a
delightful evening!--not a dull moment. And your punch--heavenly! Do ask
us again. Good night.

HOSTESS--Thank you so much! So good of you to come.

ANOTHER GUEST--Yes, we must go. I've had a perfectly dear time.

HOSTESS--So sorry you must go. So good of you to come. Good night.


IN THE DRESSING-ROOM

CHORUS OF GUESTS--Wasn't it awful?--Such low people!--Why did we ever