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You Never Can Tell by George Bernard Shaw
page 29 of 166 (17%)
is really an extraordinary old character.

DOLLY (eagerly). Oh, tell us. How long has he given you to pay?

MRS. CLANDON (distracted by her child's bad manners). Dolly, Dolly,
Dolly dear! You must not ask questions.

DOLLY (demurely). So sorry. You'll tell us, won't you, Mr.
Valentine?

VALENTINE. He doesn't want his rent at all. He's broken his tooth
on a Brazil nut; and he wants me to look at it and to lunch with him
afterwards.

DOLLY. Then have him up and pull his tooth out at once; and we'll
bring him to lunch, too. Tell the maid to fetch him along. (She runs
to the bell and rings it vigorously. Then, with a sudden doubt she
turns to Valentine and adds) I suppose he's respectable---really
respectable.

VALENTINE. Perfectly. Not like me.

DOLLY. Honest Injun? (Mrs. Clandon gasps faintly; but her powers of
remonstrance are exhausted.)

VALENTINE. Honest Injun!

DOLLY. Then off with you and bring him up.

VALENTINE (looking dubiously at Mrs. Clandon). I daresay he'd be
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