open for his escape, in case of necessity, affected great confusion
and surprise at his behaviour, saying, with an air of mortification,
"Lord be merciful unto me! is this the way you treat your own
relations, and the recommendation of your best friend? Surely all
gratitude and virtue has left this sinful world! What will cousin
Tim, and Dick, and Tom, and good mother Pipkin; and her daughters
cousin Sue, and Prue, and Peg, with all the rest of our kinsfolks,
say, when they hear of this unconscionable reception that I have
met with? Consider, sir, that ingratitude is worse than the sin
of witchcraft, as the Apostle wisely observes; and do not send me
away with such unchristian usage, which will lay a heavy load of
guilt upon your poor miserable soul."--"What, you are on a cruise
for a post, brother Trickle, an't ye?" said Trunnion, interrupting
him, "we shall find a post for you in a trice, my boy. Here, Pipes,
take this saucy son of a b-- and help him to the whipping-post
in the yard. I'll teach you to rouse me in the morning with such
impertinent messages."

Pipes, who wanted to carry the joke farther than the exciseman dreamt
of, laid hold of him in a twinkling, and executed the orders of his
commander, notwithstanding all his nods, winking, and significant
gestures, which the boatswain's mate would by no means understand;
so that he began to repent of the part he acted in this performance,
which was like to end so tragically; and stood fastened to the stake,
in a very disagreeable state of suspense; casting many a rueful
look over his left shoulder, while Pipes was absent in quest
of a cat-o'-nine-tails, in expectation of being relieved by the
interposition of the lieutenant, who did not, however, appear.
Tom, returning with the instrument of correction, undressed the
delinquent in a trice, and whispering in his ear, that he was very