house, and said to the boy:

"Look here, sonny, you go over and play awhile for Mr. Wilson. Here is ten
cents. He lives in that big white house over yonder. He plays the violin,
and likes music better than I do."

"Well," said the boy, taking the "stamp," "_I would, but he just gave me
ten cents to come over and play for you!_"


70. NOT FOOLED TWICE

San Francisco boasts of a saloon called the Bank Exchange, where the finest
wines and liquors are dispensed at twenty-five cents a glass, with lunches
thrown in free. A plain-looking person went in one morning and called for a
brandy cocktail, and wanted it _strong_. Mr. Parker, as is usual with
him, was very considerate, and mixed the drink in his best style, setting
it down for his customer. After the cocktail had disappeared the man leaned
over the bar and said that he had no change about him then, but would have
soon, when he would pay for the drink. Parker politely remarked that he
should have mentioned the fact before he got the drink; when his customer
remarked: "I tried that on yesterday morning with one of your men, but he
would not let me have the whiskey, so you could not play that dodge on
me again!" This was too good for Parker, and he told the customer he was
welcome to his drink, and was entitled to his hat in the bargain, if he
wanted it.


71. BITING SARCASM