When I had abandoned underlying resentment, I found a marked decrease
in my chastisement. In a very subtle way, Master melted into
comparative clemency. In time I demolished every wall of rationalization
and subconscious reservation behind which the human personality
generally shields itself. {FN12-17} The reward was an effortless
harmony with my guru. I discovered him then to be trusting, considerate,
and silently loving. Undemonstrative, however, he bestowed no word
of affection.

My own temperament is principally devotional. It was disconcerting
at first to find that my guru, saturated with JNANA but seemingly
dry of BHAKTI, {FN12-18} expressed himself only in terms of
cold spiritual mathematics. But as I tuned myself to his nature,
I discovered no diminution but rather increase in my devotional
approach to God. A self-realized master is fully able to guide his
various disciples along natural lines of their essential bias.

My relationship with Sri Yukteswar, somewhat inarticulate, nonetheless
possessed all eloquence. Often I found his silent signature on my
thoughts, rendering speech inutile. Quietly sitting beside him, I
felt his bounty pouring peacefully over my being.

Sri Yukteswar's impartial justice was notably demonstrated during
the summer vacation of my first college year. I welcomed the opportunity
to spend uninterrupted months at Serampore with my guru.

"You may be in charge of the hermitage." Master was pleased over
my enthusiastic arrival. "Your duties will be the reception of
guests, and supervision of the work of the other disciples."