He dare not fail to attend the ball, for the dear Duchess would never
forgive him; so he goes in and proposes to a girl he particularly
dislikes because she is dressed in pink, and the heroine told him that
she was going to wear pink. But the heroine's pink dress was late in
coming home from the modiste's and she had to turn up in blue. The
heroine comes in just as the other girl is accepting him, and there
you have a nice, live, peppy, kick-off for your tale of passion and
human interest.

But I have said enough to show that the time has come when novelists,
if they do not wish to be left behind in the race, must adapt
themselves to modern conditions. One does not wish to threaten, but,
as I say, we astigmatics are in a large minority and can, if we get
together, make our presence felt. Roused by this article to a sense of
the injustice of their treatment, the great army of glass-wearing
citizens could very easily make novelists see reason. A boycott of
non-spectacled heroes would soon achieve the necessary reform. Perhaps
there will be no need to let matters go as far as that. I hope not.
But, if this warning should be neglected, if we have any more of these
novels about men with keen gray eyes or snapping black eyes or
cheerful blue eyes--any sort of eyes, in fact, lacking some muscular
affliction, we shall know what to do.




PHOTOGRAPHERS AND ME


I look in my glass, dear reader, and what do I see? Nothing so