abstracted, toiled on week after week.

Such patience proved provoking, especially as what could be detected of the
tunes, in the snatches heard, indicated to her father's enraged feelings a
stubborn attachment to that people from whom he was trying to wean her; so
even this little comfort was sternly denied her; and, while strength was
gradually giving way under her heavy burdens, she was compelled to toil on
in silence. Under all these sore trials not only her angry father but the
evil one kept up the accusation of "stubborn disobedience."

At length she broke down under her burdens and troubles. Health, courage,
and joy in the Lord gave way together. For the drill of Parson Huntington
in Calvinian theology for nearly a year past now came up, enforced by the
instructions of childhood, with fresh power; and she began to suspect
that she was one of the "ordained reprobates," "passed by and doomed from
eternity to endless ruin!" The whole system of "free grace," impartial
atonement, and the Spirit's assurance, in the light and joy of which she
had exulted for months in Pittsfield, and been so comforted in these
subsequent months of hardship and false accusation, strangely faded before
these childhood and recent instructions; and gradually this pupil of
Augustine and Calvin sank into the doctrinal abyss of the "horrible
decrees." Nor would her broken and depressed spirits allow these sudden
conclusions to affect her as abstract dogmas. They struck her, by Satanic
power, like lightning, as terribly personal realities. "I, even I,
Elizabeth Ward, have been awfully deceived! I am one of the reprobates! I
have preferred my father's commands to God's favor! I have committed the
'unpardonable sin!'"

How unaccountable is desponding unbelief! how ingenious and active under
diabolical management! The Holy Spirit quoted to this poor, despondent girl