I never played but one game of ball in
my life that I kin remember on, and don't
believe that I ever will forgit that. You see it
wuz along in the spring time of the yeer, and
the weather wuz purty warm and sunshiny,
and the boys sed to me, "Uncle, we'd like
to have you help us play a game of base
ball." I sed, "Boys, I'm gittin' a little too
old fer those kinds of passtimes, but I'll help
you play one game, I'll be durned if I
don't." Wall, we got out in the paster and
wuz gittin' ready to play; we got the bases
and bats put around in thar places, and a
buckit of drinkin' water up in the fence
corner, whar we could get a drink when we
wanted it. We didn't have any bleachers,
but we had thirty or forty hogs, and they
wuz the best rooters you ever seen; jist then
I happened to look around and thar wuz the
biggest billy goat I ever saw in all my life.
You ought to seen the boys a-gittin' out of
the paster; I would hav got out too, but I
got stuck in the fence. Wall, you ought to
hav seen that billy goat a-gittin' me through
the fence. He didn't git me all the way
through, cos I wuz half way through when
he got thar; but he got the last half through.
I didn't make any home run, but I wuz the
only feller what had a score of the game; I