I don't so much care for a door;
But this crawling around
Without touching the ground
Is getting to be quite a bore.


I am a great friend to public amusements; for they keep people from
vice.--_Samuel Johnson_.




ANATOMY


TOMMY--"My gran'pa wuz in th' civil war, an' he lost a leg or a arm in
every battle he fit in!"

JOHNNY--"Gee! How many battles was he in?"

TOMMY--"About forty."


They thought more of the Legion of Honor in the time of the first
Napoleon than they do now. The emperor one day met an old one-armed
veteran.

"How did you lose your arm?" he asked.

"Sire, at Austerlitz."