told, always having something good to say of everything and everybody
else, live on wind and make more money than enemies. For such a man, a
good opening will be made in the "graveyard." He is too good to live.


Life in a newspaper office is one compliment after another. "You look
so funny when you think," observed the blandishing Miss Harriette
Underbill as she passed the given point known as our desk late
yesterday afternoon.


COUNTRY EDITOR (to new assistant)--"I shall expect you to write all
the editorials, do the religious and sporting departments and turn out
a joke column."

ASSISTANT--"What are you going to do?"

"Edit your copy."




EDUCATION


Education--the sum total of all the things we haven't been taught.


WILLIE (doing his homework)--"What is the distance to the nearest
star, Auntie?"