"I'm sure I don't know, Willie."

"Well, I hope, then, you'll feel sorry tomorrow when I'm getting
punished for your ignorance."


Henry was the neighborhood magistrate. He had been settling a dispute
between two blockaders. The one in whose favor the verdict was cast
was filled with admiration for the facility with which Henry made out
the papers.

"You are one of those 'read' men, ain't you Henry?"

"Yes, I kin read right smart," modestly admitted Henry.

"You been to school, ain't you?" With just pride Henry nodded his
head.

"I reckon you been through algebra!"

"Yes, I have," said Henry, "but it was night and I didn't see
nothing."


EMPLOYER--"For this job you've got to know French and Spanish, and the
pay is eighteen dollars a week."

"Lord, Mister! I ain't got no edication; I'm after a job in the
yards."