afresh on the same altar upon which it has often been pierced. O,
madam, my dear Dr. Mason goes, and leaves me here alone: in all
probability his course is nearly finished, and his crown awaits him.
Five physicians now attend him closely. I have seen him often, and he
says, 'All is well, all will be well,' Of the physicians he said,
'Yes, yes, it is very well; they are useful men in God's hand; they
may be instrumental in patching up the tabernacle a little. If it be
raised to usefulness, I am content; if not to usefulness, I do not
desire it. I feel no concern about the issue of this; the will of the
Lord be done.'

"I say, Amen; but Oh, I feel alone. I should need large
communications from his Master to fill up this blank. I cannot write
for weeping; now my face is so swelled I cannot go to church. I called
at his house this morning, found the doctors in the parlor, and
learned from them the worst. The bell was ringing for church. I
stifled as much as possible my grief; would fain have come home to
give it vent, but durst not be absent from the house of God. I heard a
stranger in Dr. Rodgers' church; our doors are closed; his text was,
'Henceforth I call you not servants, but friends;' he ran the parallel
between human friendship and that subsisting between Christ and his
disciples. I ought to be comforted, nay, I am comforted.

"The Bible lies open before me; it is full of consolation; but
all is in prospect. I look at God, what he is in himself, what he is
to his people _now_ and what he will be to _eternity_: the
consolations of hope are mine; but for the present, I feel like the
sparrow on the house-top, or like a pelican in the wilderness; and
when I think on my years and the robustness of my constitution, and
that I may have a long journey before me, I am not able to look at it.