some trade; the barber's, say, or the auctioneer's, or even the lawyer's.
That's one thing no one but the devil can do him out of! 'Believe what
your daddy says, Primigenius,' I din into his ears every day, 'whenever
you learn a thing, it's yours. Look at Phileros the attorney; he'd not
be keeping the wolf from the door now if he hadn't studied. It's not
long since he had to carry his wares on his back and peddle them, but he
can put up a front with Norbanus himself now! Learning's a fine thing,
and a trade won't starve.'"




CHAPTER THE FORTY-SEVENTH.

Twaddle of this sort was being bandied about when Trimalchio came in;
mopping his forehead and washing his hands in perfume, he said, after a
short pause, "Pardon me, gentlemen, but my stomach's been on strike for
the past few days and the doctors disagreed about the cause. But
pomegranate rind and pitch steeped in vinegar have helped me, and I hope
that my belly will get on its good behavior, for sometimes there's such a
rumbling in my guts that you'd think a bellowing bull was in there. So
if anyone wants to do his business, there's no call to be bashful about
it. None of us was born solid! I don't know of any worse torment than
having to hold it in, it's the one thing Jupiter himself can't hold in.
So you're laughing, are you, Fortunata? Why, you're always keeping me
awake at night yourself. I never objected yet to anyone in my
dining-room relieving himself when he wanted to, and the doctors forbid
our holding it in. Everything's ready outside, if the call's more
serious, water, close-stool, and anything else you'll need. Believe me,
when this rising vapor gets to the brain, it puts the whole body on the