improve his wicked opportunities, (which I thought owing to remorse for
his sin, and compassion for me,) when he had such a project as this in
reserve!--Here should I have been deluded with the hopes of a happiness
that my highest ambition could have had aspired to!--But how dreadful
must have been my lot, when I had found myself an undone creature, and a
guilty harlot, instead of a lawful wife! Oh! this is indeed too much,
too much, for your poor Pamela to support! This is the worse, as I hoped
all the worst was over; and that I had the pleasure of beholding a
reclaimed man, and not an abandoned libertine. What now must your poor
daughter do? Now all her hopes are dashed! And if this fails him, then
comes, to be sure, my forced disgrace! for this shews he will never leave
till he has ruined me--O, the wretched, wretched Pamela!


Saturday noon, one o'clock.

My master is come home; and, to be sure, has been where he said. So once
he has told truth; and this matter seems to be gone off without a plot:
No doubt he depends upon his sham wicked marriage! He has brought a
gentleman with him to dinner; and so I have not seen him yet.


Two o'clock.

I am very sorrowful, and still have greater reason; for, just now, as I
was in my closet, opening the parcel I had hid under the rose-bush, to
see if it was damaged by lying so long, Mrs. Jewkes came upon me by
surprise, and laid her hands upon it; for she had been looking through
the key-hole, it seems.