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A Parody Outline of History by Donald Ogden Stewart
page 46 of 104 (44%)

(MILES closes the window and returns to his chair by the
fireplace.)

MILES: And your aunt told me that your mother said you would
some day marry a military man.

PRISCILLA: Miles, would you mind passing me that pillow over
there?

(MILES gets up, takes the pillow to PRISCILLA and again sits
down.

MILES: And I thought that if you wanted a military man why--
well, I've always thought a great deal of you, Mistress
Priscilla-- and since my Rose died I've been pretty lonely, and
while I'm nothing but a rough old soldier yet--well, what I'm
driving at is-- you see, maybe you and I could sort of--well, I'm
not much of a hand at fancy love speeches and all that--but

(He is interrupted by a snore. He glances up and sees that
PRISCILLA has fallen fast asleep. He sits looking hopelessly
into the fireplace for a long time, then gets up, puts on his hat
and tiptoes out of the door.)

THE NEXT EVENING

PRISCILLA is sitting alone, lost in revery, before the fireplace.
It is almost as if she had not moved since the evening before.

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