"Ducks! roast ducks! and this a fast-day of the holy Church!"

"Wisha! I never thought of that; but why can't we eat a bit of duck, yer
riverence?"

"Why? Because the Council of Trint won't lave us--that's why."

"Well, well, now, but I'm sorry fur that, fur I can only give ye a bite of
bread and cheese and a glass of something hot. Would that be any harrum,
sir?"

"Harrum! by no manes, woman. Sure we must live any way, and bread and
cheese is not forbid!"

"Nayther whiskey punch?"

"Nayther that."

"Well, thin, yer riverence, would it be any harrum fur me to give a toast?"

"By no manes, Mrs. O'Brien. Toast away as much as ye like, bedad!"

"Well, thin, _here's to the Council of Trint, fur if it keeps us from
atin', it doesn't keep us from drinkin'_!"


57. THE SUN STANDING STILL

James Russell Lowell, when concluding an after-dinner speech in England,
made a happy hit by introducing the story of a Methodist preacher at a