camp-meeting, of whom he had heard when he was young. He was preaching on
Joshua ordering the sun to stand still: "My hearers," he said, "there are
three motions of the sun; the first is the straightforward or direct motion
of the sun, the second is the retrograde or backward motion of the sun,
and the third is the motion mentioned in our text--'the sun stood still.'
Now, gentlemen, I do not know whether you see the application of that story
to after-dinner oratory. I hope you do. The after-dinner orator at first
begins and goes straight forward--that is the straightforward motion of the
sun; next he goes back and begins to repeat himself a little, and that is
the retrograde or backward motion of the sun; and at last he has the good
sense to bring himself to an end, and that is the motion mentioned in our
text of the sun standing still."


58. NEUTRALIZING POISON

Col. John H. George, a New Hampshire barrister, tells a good story on
himself. Meeting an old farmer recently whom he had known in his youth,
the old fellow congratulated the Colonel on his youthful appearance.

"How is it you've managed to keep so fresh and good-looking all these
years?" quoth he.

"Well," said George, "I'll tell you. I've always drank new rum and voted
the Democratic ticket."

"Oh! yes," said the old man, "_I see how it is; one pizen neutralizes
the other!_"